1. The green thing. I mean don't get me wrong, Carey looks absolutely amazing. But for some reason, I don't know, maybe it's the velvety texture, but her dress makes me think of Kermit the Frog.


2. The bling. I'm in awe of her arm party. Well more like a hand party. Both hands no less. Don't you just want her to put her fists together and go "Wonder Twin powers…Activate!" Well, actually, I guess she'd need a twin huh?


3. The flapper headdress. I'm just going to be frank here. It looks like aluminum foil.


4. The cover verbiage. "Eat Your Weeds" annnnd I would like to direct your attention back to observation number 1.


5. The face. The smiling eyes, the barely concealed smirk. Carey looks as if she's made the same observations we have.